Happy Birthday, Mom!

G / April 8th, 2006, 10:22 am / #1

Sean,

This birthday letter to your mother is really beautiful as well as telling. I’m sure this will be a revelation for church members to hear. As important as that is, having not been a part of the church myself, but rather having gotten to know you as an individual in your own right, it speaks more to me of the deep inner work you have and are doing in the face of enormous odds; enormous odds against not only self examination, but against sanity. Your dedication to both the discernment of what is real as well as the refusal to let your own wounds prevent you from opening your heart to someone who was the source of so much pain, speaks of a level of maturity, integrety and strength of character that only comes from authentic self confrontation and honest self appraisal.

At the risk of redundancy let me say again; To have emerged from such a crazy cult background, to have forged ahead in your own relentless pursuit to understand what is true in life, as well as to work so hard (and may I say very successfully so) to define who you truly are in your own right, not just as your parents son, would be testament enough to your autonomy of spirit and strength of character. …..

But now in this letter, I witness a level of compassion, understanding, even tenderness, for one who was the source of so much of your own suffering, (as well as others) that it is clear you have and are continuously traveling willingly into the heart of your own pain, your own darkness as well as light, and have squarely faced your own capacity to wound and betray. Without such a journey one can only feign empathy. But what is expressed here is a genuine opening of the heart to a level of compassion that exists despite betrayal, that is without false sentiment, able to see nuance, and accept the shades of grey that all humans embody. And that, my friend is the mark of a heroic journey/vision, and dare I say it…spiritual depth.

It is a gift to know someone so committed to personal growth, committed to facing the imperfect and the ugly, within self and other, as well as to honoring the staggering beauty and profound capacity to love that is inherent to the human experience. I am proud to be your friend.

G

Aaron Kinney / April 10th, 2006, 2:25 pm / #3

That was incredibly deep, personal, touching, and introspective. I was very moved by what you said and the depth to which you opened up your personal life for your readers BlackSun. It takes quite a bit of courage and love to allow oneself to be so vulnerable by being so honest and forthcoming.

I think commenter G said it more eloquently than I can. This post of yours was amazingly touching and real.

Thank you for being willing to share the personal side of a cult personality that has affected the lives of so many. It brings many answers to many people, I am sure.

James Prince / April 15th, 2006, 5:43 pm / #5

As a former member of the church I have to say that this article was long overdue. There was so much chaos near the end of ECP’s leadership that I figured something had to be wrong. I could never understand how a person who had all of her superhuman abilities and was able to walk and talk with angels and masters could be so cold towards people and so unhappy with her life. Like you I have made my peace with her and I accept her apology that you have published for her with this article. I doubt I will ever really understand her and all that happened with the church. Some still believe she was annointed by God. Others believe she was evil. To this day I honestly do not know what to make of her. I hope that somewhere somehow she will find herself again as she had so much to offer this world. I looked at her as an amazing teacher who just happened to be able to commune with God. To leave so many broken hearts in her wake has been one of the saddest things I have ever seen in my life. Peace to you Sean. Peace to all those caught up in the CUT rise and fall.

BlackSun / April 17th, 2006, 5:02 pm / #7

“To this day I honestly do not know what to make of her.”

James, thanks for your comments. I’d suggest looking at her as simply a human being–no different than you or I.

__________________________________

“I still believe your mom and dad were contracted to bring these ancient teachings to the public.”

That’s the problem cathy, you still believe. That’s why you don’t see that this letter was ABOUT letting go and moving on. And it was about an admission from my mom’s own lips of something she had denied for decades. It may not be news to you, because you have been forced to make Elizabeth Clare Prophet “OK” with all her faults, so that you can continue to have your beliefs the way you want them.

But for others who are trying to move on with their lives WITHOUT ECP, hearing this retelling has been a cathartic and valuable experience.

Not to mention the fact that the whole thing (and this blog) are the end result of something she herself asked me to do. I did EXACTLY what she asked.

BlackSun / April 26th, 2006, 8:17 am / #9

Ann, thanks for your comments. Best to you and your family also.

kajilina / April 27th, 2006, 7:11 pm / #11

Dearest Shaun,
I had the good pleasure to meet your mother in the 70’s when I was going thru a very difficult time in my life. On one hand I had the vision of a higher reality on the other I detested dogma. I never joined, but read, listened and decreed because I knew in my heart that the information your mother was sharing was and is our ancient birthright, that so many have forgotten. I acually ran into her in the ladies room (after one of her profound dictations) and I remember asking her about past lives and before I could get the last word out she said in a very stern voice “It doesn’t matter who you were, but who you are now and what you do with it!” I already knew that but was profoundly greatful for the reminder. I believe as many people as there are, each and every one of is here for a very different reason, like an infinite mandala, yet we are all cells in the body of this greater picture. I feel our parents come to teach us of what not to do, that is just as important then anything else. Your mother was such a light for me at a very dark time and her Presence and her reminder of mine is what really matters. This time it is not about religion, or dogma, or being a follower, because it keeps this world fighting and in fear and separation but that each and everyone of us has the same flame inside and it is our time and blessed good fortune to be able to be anchors of the light for all humanity, just be it!! I am grateful for her reminder and despite her thinking that she didn’t pull it off, in my heart she did Shaun, because the lesson she taught of what happens when you have followers in invaluable. We all need to be leaders together this time!! I send her my profound blessings and it’s time for you to start enjoying your life and know truly, that it really is all perfect, your mothers failure would only exist if you/we don’t get the true message. These are universal truths that each and every soul recognises at some point in their evolution back to the light! Be in joy and bliss precious son!!! No worries, enjoy your life and treat your children the way you wanted to be treated, and your mothers life and gifts are truly vindicated!!!! Thank you for giving me the opportunity to give back!!!
Kajimo

Govert Schuller / May 14th, 2006, 9:25 am / #13

May 14 2006,
Dear Sean Prophet,

Find below something of a response to your open letter to your mother. It’s actually a letter to a good friend of mine. He asked me to post it on your site here, which request I’m gladly fulfilling. Thanks for executing your mother’s request, though, as you will read below, I have a philosophical and moral issue with the way you thought best doing so. I share this writing in the spirit of the theosophical motto ‘no religion higher than truth,’ and in gratitude for the things you did accomplish for your mother and CUT.

Happy Mother’s Day
Govert Schuller

May 06 2006,
Dear xxxx,

Sean’s take on faith and reason is based on a fallacy in this case, IMO, because both need each other. He argues from the basis of a false dichotomy. Of course one can denounce faith on the basis of historical (and current) aberrations in the form of fundamentalism and abuse, but that doesn’t mean it does not have a necessary and benign function in science and argument. One could make a similar argument against reason, for it has shown its own aberrations in logicisms and anti-spiritual empiricism.

My philosophical researches in both domains have made me aware of the faith-component of reason and the reason-component of faith, even to the extent that both meld into one ‘complex.’ First of all in science it has been pointed out that the actual procedure of its progress is based on the hypothetic-deductive method, which means that by hunch or insight one formulates a hypothesis about a certain group of phenomena and then deduce experiments to check if the hunch was right. If the hypothesis survives testing and also survives attempted refutations and leads to more fruitful research, then there is good reason to stick with it. But, as all truths are provisional and all hypotheses have been proven to have limited applicability, one can never be completely sure. It’s open-ended. Now, the faith-component in this process is this tacit sense, molded by experience, that one hypothesis might be better than another, or that the so far only one hypothesis might bear fruit. It’s by a leap of faith that one proceeds. Meanwhile there is another faith component active, and that’s the faith in the whole history of science and its accomplishments so far, which by themselves have only been achieved by leaps in ‘insightful’ faith.

BTW, applying this model one can come to the idea that Bacon’s inductive method was in its own time a helpful idea to get the new natural sciences grounded in reality and leave behind the often erroneous ideas of the church fathers and the Greeks, whose authority were mostly used to deduce the ‘correct’ propositions regarding nature and God. But the Baconian method later on was shown to be deficient, because it did not explicitly incorporate the reality that if one gathers all the facts upon which a reasonable generalization could be based, one already is guided by an implicit criterion of choice, which would be none other than a tacitly held hypothesis. So Bacon was both right and wrong, a subtlety probably a lot of faith-based lightbearers will have a hard time with, for they will tend to absolutize Bacon even in the face of a very reasonable and verifiable philosophy of science.

The reason-component of faith has been quite strong in most religions. Reasoning and arguing have mostly been part of faith-based traditions, but authoritarian decisions regarding what should be considered the truth were more rule than exception. The West has found two ways out of this situation: freedom of religion and freedom of science. The first makes religion a matter of ones private conscience, while science makes it a matter of public experimental proof. Both are fortunately beyond the reach of other people’s dogmatics, but the problem is that conscience is too private and can degenerate into bizare delusions, while science is too public and can degenerate in dogmatically denying inner experiences. Can we find a reasonable middle-way where there would be a public space for confessing one’s own private experience-based spiritual philosophy even while this philosophy can be critically evaluated on the basis of the insight that all truths are only provisional hypotheses, which can be refuted or improved upon within an inter-subjective context? I think that’s quite possible and in the beginning the Theosophical Society was quite successful in creating that space. But that space is very vulnerable, for it is constantly attacked, even from within, by the tendency towards fundamentalist dogmatics in both spirituality and science, or by a migration within people’s consciousness towards a more private secluded realm away from abusive dogmatics, but then also escaping the responsibility of both giving and receiving a healthy dose of intersubjective scrutiny. I hope I gave you some of the contours of a fused faith-reason complex and how that might work.

Sean Prophet gave me a valuable contribution by sharing his mother’s words, because it can clarify certain aberrations within CUT without having to invalidate ECP’s contributions to humanity as he tries to argue. First of all the tendency towards authoritarianism and abuse within CUT did indeed go back all the way to the top. It was ECP’s attitude that filtered down through upper and middle management and local leadership. There are enough anecdotes and now a confession to refute the idea that it was merely the middle cadre that was on a power-trip while ECP was trying to set, ineffectively, the right example of a more relaxed and tolerant leadership. It can be argued that ECP became aware of the need to reform herself and CUT in a gradual way and over the span of many years. Very important here was the hiring of, and delegation of power to, Gilbert Cleirbaut through whom the confession came that CUT had degenerated into a toxic organizational culture. Without some inner reflection by ECP on the state of affairs of CUT this move would never have happened. Open question would be about the extent of her awareness of her own responsibility and even culpability in this and how much she tried to reform herself during the Cleirbaut presidency. Unfortunately the reform was only partially successful. The downsizing and streamlining of operations might have been successful, but the reform of the culture was not. I think the upper management of CUT split up in different factions with the cultural reformers losing the ensuing power struggle and leaving one by one their positions. Measured from certain effects in the field one could only conclude that CUT after Cleirbaut was run by a clique of well-intended, half-competent, non-reformed lightbearers affected still by authoritarian tendencies, which they had learned from ECP and probably regarded, out of idolatry, as sacred.

Now, having said all that about this unfortunate authoritarian attitude of ECP and CUT, does it logically follow that the truth-claims of the Ascended Master teachings as they have come down from Mark and ECP, including their predecessors in Theosophy and the I AM Movement, are therefore all false? Many artists and scientists have had personal shortcomings. Does that invalidate the beauty and truth of their creations? I don’t think so, but Sean apparently does in case of his mother and makes the fallacious step of interpreting his mother’s request to help her pay off her karmic debt incurred by her abuse of power as if she requested to denounce the whole of her faith and teachings as she had shared those in her ministry. Is Sean here on his own power trip and abusing the words of his own mother in order to further his own anti-faith rationalistic world-view? Isn’t he doing the same thing that he is accusing his mother of? In short, is Sean a hypocrite? I hate to think so because his open letter to his mother seems so full of sincerity and valid observations and he is expressing a legitimate complaint about his mother, but still, the question has to be asked.

Dear xxxx, sorry to have gone on for such a while. I only wanted to express the idea that Sean’s take on the purported dichotomy of faith and reason rests on the false premise of their mutually exclusionary nature and that his execution of his mother’s request is seriously marred by the fallacy of inferring from her confessed abuse of power, the falsity of her faith.

David Tame / May 18th, 2006, 3:38 am / #15

Dear Sean,

I’m with Govert on this one and I don’t think your point of view holds consistent logic, given the wider knowledge of mystical experiences and that ‘science’ so-called can be so flawed. It is clear to me that you have no knowledge of the actual history and background to science. Science and faith are in no way mutually exclusive. Many of the greatest scientific advances began with a kind of mystical ‘hunch’, or a dream, or an inner certainty which appears to have been a mystical, spiritual certainty, that one method would work and a hundred others would not. Science is very often nothing to do with a process of logic outplaying itself, like robot-drones trying a million experiments mechanically. It simply does not work that way. There’s an intuitional component which may be likened indeed to faith – or might be likened to insight being ‘given’ from Above.

From my perspective, you were obviously at the core and saw the abuses and the strangeness in CUT. In fact, for some reason you were one of the very first people I found myself writing to when I first went online in the 1990s, within days, and you clearly could not compile in a couple of emails to me all the weirdness you witnessed, though you tried, so thanks for that.

I do understand that a lot was not right. But Govert’s point is that this does not disannul the existence of the Masters, for example. These days they wisely choose to speak through Messengers without appearing physically to all. If the Messengers are flawed - and they do hold a heavy burden – this does not logically lead to a dismissal of the Masters’ existence. In the days of Theosophy They did it differently, and appeared physically to dozens of people. There are untold numbers of testimonies of that.

Read this for example, a fascinating ‘casebook’ of physical encounters:
http://www.blavatskyarchives.com/mastersencounterswith.htm
It’s a great resource since we don’t have to question here the authenticity of Messengers when these are first-hand, physical encounters. In Theosophy they happened by the score.

I agree with Govert’s view completely. Bacon redressed the balance from superstition (but I suspect knew there was a need for faith, and had it). Then you’ve got the various strands of critical philosophy toward modern science, which in at least several ways show the limits to its “logic”. Everything from construction through language to peoples’ career-interests are involved. The philosophy of science shows clearly that science is not logical. It’s a huge subject and you appear to not know of it. Science is a ‘construction’ based upon career-dependence, going with the flow, filtering out awkward data and not looking at it. It’s simply a construction. Science in the West is in fact a form of faith. Faith in science. It’s a very ill-founded faith since the philosophy of science shows how flawed its supposed ‘reasoning’ is.

We only have to read the Vedas to find that they also knew of quarks, aircraft, medicine, electricity, nuclear power – but came from a different angle or perspective, and so ‘our’ science won’t look at or admit that there have been ‘different’ and equally useful sciences through the millennia.

Try reading “Science, The Very Idea�? by Steve Woolgar. Or “What Is This Thing Called Science?�? by A.F. Chalmers. You’ll very quickly find that your idea of reason being behind ‘science’ is quite ill-founded and incorrect. Science can be highly irrational; on the other hand people with a purpose work through science in faith.

Your perspective is also a denial of mystical experiences which to me have always been at the core of ALL; and by ‘reason’ I can’t deny those I’ve had myself, and the insights which transcended even Faith.

Dear Sean, what you are not seeing – which on one hand is understandable, yet in another sense is rather startling to me – is that your point of view is an extreme reaction to your upbringing. You are correct in being skeptical of the nonsense you were witness to; you are incorrect in rejecting everything due to your own life-history thus far. It’s all reactionism, and very clearly so as we read it.

However, all the best, and very best wishes from me,

David Tame

David Tame / May 19th, 2006, 4:37 am / #17

Dear Sean,

Let me begin by affirming that this brief dialogue with you is in my heart a very friendly one. Thanks for it! We are simply sampling different points of view together, right? I have no intent to carry it on at length.

On your point “1�? above, have you ever had a deep, life-transforming, mystical experience? You are never the same again if you do. I have had them, mainly in a period as I was in the Himalayas. It actually transcends the subject of “faith vs. reason�? as neither are involved. You become a part of the ONE, and you KNOW. Of course, you may call it a psychotic episode, but the history through time of those who have experienced this is there for all to read. It is not blind faith, and it is not mechanical or robotic ‘reason’. You become ONE with Reality. And BTW, I did this before I even found CUT. Such experiences are out there if people have the motivation to seek them out.

Your point “2�? on science.

Again, you clearly are unaware of the philosophy of science as has been written about for a century now. There is nothing logical about science. I already made this point and will not continue, as you have the books I mentioned which you could read if you’d like to.

Sean, your point “3�? on the Masters and on your own experiences. Heck, I can’t reply to that in an intellectual way as I’d love to be there with you right now and just be a pal, whether we agree or not. I speak from the heart. Did I sound condescending? Sorry about that, if so. I just have a style in which I write. But as a friend who read the thread just wrote to me: “He’s a lot like his mom - can’t be wrong! No-one anywhere has mentioned individual attunement as the means testing for truth…..it’s the only way we can know anything - by listening to the heart and the Presence - and not someone else.�?

I don’t necessarily agree with every word there, but what comes across is that you can’t be reached. Did you read the link I gave on the casebook of physical encounters with the Masters? All of it? You think all were deluded? I doubt most readers here will agree.

Dear Sean, let’s call that dialogue ‘done’, though of course you may wish to reply again.

On a quite different note, and to add to your thread:

I was on staff in the USA for a couple of years, and served for about a decade in the London TC. I was actually the first Keeper in Europe. (From 1977.) The culture was pretty awful at times, but individually, since in England we were so far away and the USA didn’t affect us too much, we often had superb years and they are one of the high-lights of my life so far. There was joy, friendship, spirituality … LOL and when things got into the “Labors�? I kinda unconsciously withdrew.

I would just like to close in sharing with you and anyone else that while I am a critic of some of your mother’s mixed theology, she and I never felt anything negative toward each other. To my astonishment, since CUT already had several thousand members, from 1984 I began getting long letters from her – just out of the blue! How did she find the time for that? She asked, “How are your studies going? How is your job? How is your health, and anything else you want to tell me.�? I was very moved. She in that time once wrote a note saying that she was “devastated�? since she had dictated a long letter to me (I have no idea about what) but the secretary “lost the tape, and I cannot find time to repeat it�?. LOL, no doubt the secretary got the blue ray treatment.

But I would like to end in attesting that for a couple of years, over the miles and over the ocean, she tried to be another mother to me, in the normal (not at all Guru) sense. I so remember that – though I still do see her flaws.

I should add that this episode began when she tried a “blue ray�? on me in Montana and I stood up to it. Why didn’t more people do that? It is as though they were going along with the culture. I faced up to her and I saw her physically back down. She never tried to boss me about again, but respected me. I can’t say if she would do that with everyone (!), but it worked for me.

The lesson being: have a Teacher or Guru if you like, but keep your own independent mind, and you’ll come out OK! There was a complicity going on whereby others went along with the culture, in error.

IMHO things are starting anew elsewhere now. IMHO there is a new start elsewhere now, and the culture is fine and wonderful.

Sincerely,

David Tame

Brenda Macedo / May 29th, 2006, 9:12 am / #19

Dear Sean,

I forgot to mention one fact in my last note to you.

In your last message you asked the same question I asked your mother years ago…that is:
how are we supposed to believe in ascended masters when none of the messengers can seem to recognize or even acknowledge one another??

I believe that this problem, as well as many of the problems your mother faced could have easily been avoided.
If ECP had simply recognized the visionaries in her own movement, who were having similar experiences as she was, the necessary checks and balances would have been in place to keep the abuses of power from happening.

There were several visionaries, not just myself, as I mentioned in my last comment, who could have helped in this area.

Instead, your mother made the mistake of trying to consolidate her power, by trying to keep the heirarchy of “attainment” within the boundaries of her own blood family. For example, she mistakenly declared you a Buddha, even though you obviously have had no experiences of the masters whatsoever. This plan of ECP to consolidate her own personal power through her children, even to the extent of getting in vitro fertilization at age 55, backfired terribly.

In the Age of Aquarius, we are all supposed to work together. And we are ALL entitled to witness and communicate with the Masters. In contrast to this, your mother ran a top-down, top-heavy, dictatorial type of organization, which systematically invalidated anyone except she and her own family. I don’t think St. Germain ever intended it to be that way.
That was unfair to you and your sisters as well.

Fortunately, there are others who see the masters and are not controlling. There are even communities of highly evolved souls, for example, in Mt. Shasta, who communicate with masters and are not jealous of one another…nor do they desire a following or a support system.

I’m certain that someday, if you fast for a long period of time and pray, you also will see the Masters, and their reality will no longer elude you and cause you to waste time writing skeptical articles about their existence. Catostrophic illness and drastic lifetime changes can also open this door for them to enter.
I know, Jesus helped me through mine…and yes, I have no qualms about saying that I saw Him, and I love Him.

I pray that someday, you will to.

Take care,
Brenda Macedo

Brenda Macedo / May 30th, 2006, 4:32 pm / #21

“When I close my eyes for the final time, it’s fade to black.
I harbor no illusions…”

Dear Sean,

Your words are very stoic.
When you said, “fade into black”, is that where you obtained your idea for the Black Sun Journal??
Or was it from the idea of you being the “black son”
(in your own mind) of ECP?
You don’t have to answer, I was just curious.

Yes, both major tragedies and major changes can signal an entrance, at times, for the appearance of various Ascended Masters. Perhaps it is because, as Einstein once said, “the problems in this dimension are usually not solvable in the same dimension…” You have to go up a notch. It takes a stepping out, or going beyond the present situation to actually solve the problem, both mathematically, and personally. I believe, that’s where the masters come in, only because it’s happened that way in my own life.

This “going up a notch” can happen in communities of people who interact with each other at a high level or interact with various power points on the globe with powerful magnetic fields, such I mentioned in Mt. Shasta or the Tetons.

Nola Van Valer witnessed ascended masters Mt. Shasta and gave vivid accounts. Norma Milanovich covered many unanswered questions that your mother never touched upon in her brilliant book, “The Light Shall Set you Free.” ( and is she alive to talk about it) By the way, in her book, she exhonorates you of ever having been “King Solomon.” (I thought you’d be happy about that.) She states that El Morya was King Soloman, and I agree. For some reason, your mother placed this burden upon you… but it was inaccurate.

I bring up the tragedies in my life not to point fingers, but to reiterate that even though I was ex-communicated from your mother’s group, I still did not discount the masters and what they had to teach me through their appearances and revelations. Nor do I discount the revelations of other people…who I trust, are sound and coherent enough not to be “making it all up” as you seem to believe.

If what Einstien said is true, that there is no time, or that time bends back in upon itself, then it would not be that difficult for a yogi or a master to punch a hole through time and space to reach us.This phenomenon is just not measurable by us with our limited senses at this juncture in time…
Case in point, Masuro Emoto recently acertained the quality of music by measuring the effect it has on water crystals (which ultimately affects our bodies since they are 90% water). He did this through electro-magnetic resonance photography and thus discovered that water molecules are affected by our thoughts.

Just as you mentioned Copernicus in a prior article, discovering that the earth was not the center of the solar system…it was just a matter of time. It’s just a matter of time before we can measure the issues that you question.

When you do leave your body in your time, I can bet you that you will not just see a black hole.
(All bets subject to collection on the other side.)

The black hole description is not even comprable to what normal people see in after death experiences.
I cannot say exactly what you will see, but I know it will not be a black hole…even if a black hole is all you want to see.
Is it?

Take care,
Brenda Macedo
Santa Fe, New Mexico

WW / June 8th, 2006, 9:06 pm / #23

Thank you Sean, for writing this. I appreciate the fact that you tried to quote your mother as literally and respectfully as you possibly could remember.

She did not personally harm me, or probably even really knew of my existence as a lowly KOF, her statement to you helps me find closure to an important chapter in my life.

I hope many people that were connected to CUT in one way or another will find their way here, and read this.

Best wishes to you and your family.

RDF / July 17th, 2006, 9:44 pm / #25

Wow Sean,
What a revealing little tale you’ve told! There are a few problems with it though. (1) This is 2006 and it was 1997-9 when your mom told you she felt awful about all the bad things she did to hundreds of thousands of people in her church? Is there a good reason you waited 10 years to come out with this story? Don’t you think it would have benefited a lot more people if you’d shared all this with us earlier?!
(2) Your whole story is laced throughout with pity for your mom. Poor ECP! She DID feel sorry and she DID write letters to everyone. Wow that just makes all the shit she foisted on everyone so much easier to bear.
(3) As I’ve told you before YOU and your siblings are all part of the problem with ECP and CUT, but you still refuse to admit it. You see yourself as a victim and when push comes to shove you’d rather shift the blame on the CUT membership than admit that the CUT leadership of which you and your sisters were part and parcel of. were the originators, instigators, amd propagators of all those lies you say you grew up around. Come on Sean did you never ever use your position as ECP’s son to screw people over and to abuse and manipulate them? Careful waht you say since I know quite a few people who worked side by side with you and know the little games you played inside out:-)
(4) You make it sound like ECP was just misguided and not actually evil. She knew exactly what she was doing as did you father and together they created a monster which destroyed countless lives. EXP and MLP deserve absolutely no pity whatsoever. The whole lie that was called Summit Lighthouse and then CUT was begun BY them. They invented it all. They stole and regurgitated info from past liars including the Ballards, so PLEASE be honest with yourself at least (if you will not be honest with us) and stop perpetuating the lies you grew up with by trying to make all of us feel sorry for your poor little mommie who miraculously came to the conclusion that she had done wrong to so many people over so many years. Your words are hypocritical and they do nothing but make you llok like a fool who is still perpetuating the lies invented by you parents. You know Sean, I have a pretty good feeling that this is genetic. You just cannot help yourself. You simply have to live out the genetic mandate of your Prophet genes and continue behaving as if you know all there is to know. Your Prophet arrogance runs your life and thoughts, while you are self consumed with the frustration that you were never able to become Prince Prophet. Your crazy mother saw to it that not only would the organization implode but that you or your sisters would ever receive any REAL love while she was queen bee. Of course once she became afflicted it was a different story. Then she could show child-like love. Unfortunately even a real vegetable like a zucchini or an eggplant can show more love than ECP can in her present condition.
Anyhow Seam, do you have more stories about your mom feeling sorry about all the crap she piled on people’s heads over the years? I for one would like to hear more about how bad she REALLY felt; especially around those same years in the late nineties, just as she was telling everyone to build bomb shelters and buys guns. Poor thing she must have been soooo troubled and not have a sngle person in her own church in whom to confide since she had trained them all to lie so well and to care less about people’s feelings. Sean, Sean, Sean, how CAN you sleep at night!?

G.F. / July 19th, 2006, 11:21 am / #27

RDF,

What is revealing in your comment is how much projection you are engaging in. Clearly you haven’t taken a look inside and considered the role you played in the maintainance of yourself as a victim. Unless you were born into the organization, you at some point made a conscious choice to be there…and therein lies some responsibilty…( even if you were born in, there would still be a degree of responsibilty once you achieved a certain age and level of mental/psychological development).. No matter how small, this willingness to participate is nonetheless a real part of the dynamic between leaders and followers which Sean refers to. If people weren’t so willing to give up their discernment and self governing sensibilities then leaders such as these would not have a leg to stand on. It takes two to tango !!

AND YES , people such as the Prophets do feed off of others weakness/vunerabilities..and that is disgusting, .. no doubt about it. It is sick. But as long as an adult willingly walks in, no matter how much pain or confusion they are in and hands over their mind/life to another human being, they ultimately have no one but themselves to blame for starting it. I imagine you walked in of your own accord..and even if someone else convinced you to try the scene out, the moment the first affront to your humanity took place, if you didn’t stand up to it, that is on you. This doesn’t mean I hold no compassion or understanding for what drives people to look for,or thirst for answers to the ‘big questions’…Of course I get that and truly empathize. No one is immune from that .. Life can be very hard and painful, and its very understandable that at times we are all more vulnerable than at other times.I especially sympathize with the vulnerabilty of young adults to cults such as these. Even so, we each must take some responsibility for our decisions. That does not mean we are bad people….Nor does it imply that we should not have some real compassion for our own predicaments and pain… we owe ourselves that compassion. . But it does mean we recognize a poor decision. Even if it was the best we could do at the time…,(the psychological phenomenon of brain washing in cults is very real, and not always an easy thing to get out from under)…recognizing how we said YES to the situation, now means we have increased our odds of having healthier discernment, and making better choices for ourselves present and future.. especially when we are most vulnerable.

If you had taken some time to reflect on your own contribution to this as a devotee, ( which again, in no way minimizes the reality of your pain and suffering experienced under the Prophets leadership,) no matter how well intentioned, or sincere or trusting you were in your spiritual search, all your venom would not be spewing all over Sean, who has in fact( have you read this blog?) taken full responsibility for his past , apologozed very publicly and very sincerely for his complicity in CUT, and for any hurt that was caused by his actions..

The pitty you refer to, is not at all what I take away from Sean’s letter. If you read carefully, without seizing on any and all opporunity to take words out of context, this letter was laced with a combination of further apology, deeper explanation for some of what transpired toward the end, along with some mature adult compassion for the humanity of his mother. In my opinion Sean never let his mom off the hook, and yet, he was far enough along in his own development to be able to recognize that when it comes to human behavior, as easy and at times satisfying, as it is to ‘black and white’ people who have caused you a great deal of pain. (seeing someone as all evil or all saintly) there is rarely…rarely unadulterated evil in people. This in no way watered down his acknowledgemnent of her or his own very real abuses of power and damaging actions…rather it reflected a profound understanding that people are complex multilayered beings…It is far more responsible to the truth of human nature, and of Sean to tangle with the multifaceted complexity of this reality. It is more difficult and developmentally a more mature position to hold the tension of these complexities than to simply call oneself a victim and another the evil perpetrator.

AND in all fairness to you, there is a time in the healing process to be fucking furious at injustices one has lived through. Evidently, you are still in this phase, and in my opinion you have every right to be there as long as you need to.. you rightly deserve expression of your pain and anger… beacause no matter how much complicity you had in handing over your trust….these people still abused your trust. Nevertheless, as time goes on, if a person is to continue to develop psychologically and mature, there comes a time when the formerly blind rage outward becomes tempered with an ability to stand back and dispassionately analayze the workings of a situation. It is the mature thing to take a look at what one contributed to ones own victimhood…as I said before,not in a self flagellating way by any means, that just perpetuates a ‘Complex’ of extremes… but in reflecting on ones willingness to participate, therein lies the key to self ownership and freedom to create owns own life anew, with the imprint of the past no longer imposing itself on the present and future. There is a very real liberation of ones authentic spitituality in this. AND everyone, has their own timing in coming to this place.

To wrap it up , it is my opinion that Seans vocalization of some compassion and insight into aspects of ECPs nature and action was /is in no way excusing her. I hear a combination of compassion along with dispassionate observation and understanding of power dynamics expressed here… No pity or self pity (coming from him that is…)..just telling it like it is.

Morgaine

Ron C. / January 22nd, 2007, 6:21 pm / #29

Dear Sean, I was involved with C.U.T for about eight months 10-99′to 6- 00′ from the very beginning the introductory program ( programming ) things seemed wrong they were telling me what books I could read ( non-approved ),(Sounded like the Nazis) , colors that were bad I could go down the list of screwed up things but it would take up pages. I left C.U.T. because I learned to challenge everything a long time ago and not to follow anything blindly and too many things looked and felt wrong. After leaving I met a very dear person and was told of ” seeing a Dictation on the computer screen ” Two weeks later this same Landmark Dictation (script) was given to followers . This friend of mine has never lied to me and is the child of one of the personal assistants to E.C.P.

BlackSun / June 8th, 2007, 8:49 am / #31

LKN Nix,

Meeting her personally changed our lives forever, and for the better.

Don’t kid yourself. It is a well documented fact that people who enter religions experience a reduction in anxiety and often feel as if their “lives were permanently changed for the better.” Problem is, it works by believing in things that are not true. Children feel much better thinking that Santa Claus exists. But eventually we have to grow up an put away these illusions if we are to experience the fullness of our lives.

You’ve dismissed the truth of your parents’ faith and possibly all faiths because you have felt hurt by the fact that what you imaginied life should or shoudn’t be, did or didn’t happen. All adults experience such disappointment, but eventually we realize that our parents did their best,

If I had a nickel for every time I had that demeaning little analysis thrown in my face, I’d be a rich man. In actual fact, I have rejected faith because there is absolutely no evidence it is true. And believing things on insufficient evidence is a recipe for disaster, as we have seen over and over again throughout human history.

Look, if you like practicing your faith and it makes you feel good, I have no problem with that. But don’t going around trying to pretend you have some inside corner on cosmic truth that came through my parents. I can assure you, you don’t. They made a lot of it up on the fly. I watched things discussed around the dinner table later come out in dictations. You people have no idea how badly you had the wool pulled over your eyes. All because you so desperately wanted to believe.

True believers such as yourself made it impossible for my parents to ever reach a realistic assessment of their delusions. They were corrupted by their power and the members were willing participants in that sordid drama.

I am grateful every day I wake up that I have already been healed from the worst disease that can afflict the human mind–gullibility, credulity, and blind faith.

BlackSun / June 9th, 2007, 12:54 pm / #33

How sad Sean that you now think this way. No one pulled the wool over my eyes. I wasn’t desperate or gullible.

Oh, how faith ruins the mind. I spent 30 years with my mother, and you’re going to claim you know her better than I did? That you understand better than I do what she meant to convey, when I was there first hand? And you think you’re the only deluded individual who ever said such things to me? The gall, the condescension–the sheer hubris of you people.

Save your pity, ’cause you’re going to need it for yourself when you realize your faith caused you to waste the best years of your life. Have fun with ‘El Morya,’ and your other imaginary friends, and their mock battles with the ‘entities, fallen angels, Nephilim and flying saucers.’ Don’t say you weren’t warned.

De-evolved Gandalf / September 1st, 2007, 6:51 pm / #35

Hello,
I’m so grateful to have come across this site. I was wondering if anyone has direct knowledge about CUT’s current methods for disseminating their ideas. I’ve been perusing the internet for a few days doing research on the concepts of ascended masters, violet flame, light bearers, etc. There is very little information in the scholarly journals (based on a search in Academic Search Premier), but there are endless websites for groups, in one way or another, dedicated especially to the ascended masters. I understand that much of this jargon derives from H.P. Blavatsky and was then later popularized by Ballard and his I AM Activity. But, in regards to CUT specifically, I’ve read one reply to a blog post (on an anti-cult site) suggesting that their mission has become more toned down and subtle, i.e., making the Ascended Masters house-hold names.

The reason I’m interested is because I have a very good friend who has, within the past year, come under the sway of someone who advertises (mainly through word of mouth, apparently, but also on two ascended master devoted websites: Heart’s Network and New Wisdom University) a kind of quantum healing balance service. There is nothing in this lady’s literature that references ascended masters, other than the clue inherent in the color violet, but I’ve met her a couple of times by way of my friend and received her “balance work” (only to see this garbage up close…$60/hr “balance sessions” either in person or over the phone, $5 crisis calls, etc.), and she is DEFINITELY in the ascended master, violet flame, light bearer, dweller substance, 51% balance, I AM decree, St Germain, etc., crowd. Rev. Karen (who claims she has nothing to do with any organized religion) is obviously of the theosophic lineage, but has combined this stuff with her chiropractics nonsense (muscle testing) and the new New Age craze for quantum consciousness and meditation.

I’m very concerned for my friend. She has told me that Rev. Karen no longer charges her and that she is grooming her as an apprentice of sorts. My friend has been told that she is a light bearer (me too apparently) and has worked with ascended masters in past lifetimes. The more she is initiated into this fantasy world the angrier she gets whenever I question her about it or challenge its quack, pseudo-scientific underpinnings. There’s an underlying tension between us when we hang out now, so much so that if I say anything even slightly analytical she’ll say something nasty to me and start a fight, going after my questioning nature…it’s just my “dweller” you understand… I’m concerned about her mental state, but even more so for her health and the health of her two young children. Rev. Karen actively discourages people from going to doctors, taking medicine, x-rays, surgery…Western medicine in general….you get the picture.

Anyway…I’m determined to convince my friend of the error of her ways, but I’m not sure that under cutting the “science” of it is going to do anything but anger her more and turn to Rev. Karen for re-validation. But if I can make the connection from the Ascended Master stuff back to the insanity of CUT, and further back to Blavatsky’s racist “root race” theories (my friend is of mixed ethnicity: Thai and Caucasion, her step-father is Jewish) then she could read for herself the convoluted and nightmarish history behind the methods toward “ascension” her guru seems to be initiating her into. Essentially, what I’m wondering is: does anyone know of any systematic attempt on the part of CUT (or what’s left of it) to market their ideas in a more discrete and subtle manner so that I can demonstrate, even more clearly, a direct line from Rev. Karen to E.C. Prophet. My friend is capable of introspection and analysis, but is becoming increasingly less so.

I would be tremendously grateful for any insight into this matter or any advice in regards to de-programming my friend.

Thanks,
whitjj1974@yahoo.com

M.S. / November 1st, 2007, 4:26 am / #37

Thank you for the information that you reveal here.

I have found, for instance, useful details for those who believe in the Masters and their teaching, like internet addresses of ascended masters activities that are taking place right now, and links to articles that contain clarifications with respect to the teaching, and also other details that I consider excellent, like your own testimony about your own suffering and insecurities, which is good philosophy for those who seek to understand spirituality.

Your own criticism of your mother and father is unvaluable. Also, it allow us to confirm that they were really excellent persons. I believe, from what you write, that you share this knowledge with me, that they were excellent persons.

I’ve been reading what you write and after the initial shock at your denial, I’m starting to think that you are not the “bad” guy you would like us to think you are. For example, denying that there is an El Morya doesn’t make you bad–it just makes the guru-chela relationship a little complicated in your case. As I understand it, your denial doesn’t even exclude the existence of a guru-chela relationship.

Also, as I observe your adherence to Truth and desire to bring about progress through the means that you have adopted, it is clear to me that those thirty years that you spent at the Church did leave a mark, and not a bad one at all. I say, it is twisted, but you could still very well be a chela.

Furthermore, I am under the impression that you are rather in the need to release some PROPAGANDA on your behalf, for a purpose. And for some reason–probably fear–you believe that it serves you better to dissociate yourself from the Church and teaching for now.

I do not think that you do wrong, since, after all, what is required is self-knowledge through self-realization and self-regeneration. And we are pretty much alone for this, so I cannot blame you for your efforts.

To this, I would like to share with you a big detail about me that I hope would make you reconsider the importance of your experience.

When I met my first Ascended Master, face to face, it was in 1989, and I did not know yet about the teachings of Mark Prophet or Elizabeth. I didn’t know what a decree was. I was living in a Mexican jungle. Yet I would meditate devotedly, four to six hours a day. I was completely ignorant that there was a CUT or a young spoiled gringo like you, with such parents.

I only met your Mother in 1993, when I visited, intrigued, because I had since then moved to Canada, following the path that a Master had set for me. By now I had heard about her, and wanted to see if it was not a scam. And it was not: The connection to the higher realms was there, and I KNEW and was able to see it because I KNEW about it. Your Mother’s focusing of those higher vibrations enabled me to tap into the etheric vibration that I wanted.

It is important to understand that had your Mother NOT being there, had your Father NOT being there, I would have met the Masters ANYWAY. So your denying here doesn’t amount to much as far as I am concerned, because, since I met them FIRST by other means than your parents, you do not have anymore the authority or credibility to deny their existence, as far as I am concerned. I hope that you would be intelligent enough to consider that the perception of your attempts here will be the same for anyone that is in my position. As I said, I believe you are giving yourself too much importance. Since it is so, you could perhaps benefit from rethinking your issues.

For the record, I have to add that when I visited in 1993, I wanted Spirit, so I did not stay at the ranch. It was useless: I could do the same required inner work elsewhere, where I was needed. Perhaps I would had met you there, while you were still involved, had I wanted anything less that that higher vibration that your Mother kindly sustained in the physical for all who wished to witness and develop it.

Denis / January 14th, 2008, 5:10 am / #39

Update on my previous post: the website mentioned has a new url:

http://www.enlightenment-based-magic.com/

Sean …having such an “interesting” lifepath, as ECP son/the whole church trip….to your current stance where fact and logic reigns supreme…it would be fascinating to hear your analysis of the above site. (It may have resonance with you or..you may pick holes. Whatever.)
The site purports to outline with
ONLY sheer logic

…absolutely NO faith needed or required. Diagrams assist the steps of logic.
Somebody who is determined to use only clear thinking/their brain should get food for thought.
BEST WISHES in all ways.

Gordon A. / January 18th, 2008, 2:18 am / #41

addendum:

Actually after reading through more of your site it looks like you are not likely to embrace, shake hands with, or even wave casually at faith ever again!

Nevermind. Best wishes in any case. If religious salvation or spiritual liberation do not exist in your observed universe, then may the final mind at the end of time record you and keep you.